Call from Heaven

A bird tapped on the window today. I went to see and it flew away. I went back and sit on my couch.. what should I write? My childhood friend came in my mind. The best friend someone can have . Mischievous , funny , super energetic- childhood buddy . Haven’t heard from him since my 3rd grade as he used to visit His grandparents only during summer breaks ( who were our neighbors) and we moved to our new residence afterwards . So when I suddenly remembered him today- I decided to say hi on Facebook. And what I found were lots of RIP comments. I was completely numb. I don’t know what happened... all I know is my childhood friend is no more. And that’s such a sad sad thing.. We take people, friends -life for granted and yet their is no guarantee..
praj101

Modeling

Not the one with skimpy tops
Not the one with kitty kat walks
This one is the one - the best of all
Where you model the creme of the crops

Swimmers want to model Michael Phelps
Tennis players know that Federer is the best
Model the writers that matches your views
What they did - will that works for you?

Read about Opera’s horrific hardships
Tony Robbins grueling tough times
They did something to turn the table
Rocky roads taught them- made them able

Auto-Biography and memorabilia’s
And so many self help books there are
Model the talk- the walk - the routine
As “ achievements” have almost linear curve

Teachers , mentors, books and a reflection time
Guiding the path with their bright light
Modeling others can be a great resource
Mapping our road to reach new heights

Some mistakes are done- no need to repeat
When we make our new ones and learn from it
We are the guides now for future generations
Maybe they will model us and also learn a bit

Praj101

Guilt Card

Guilt Card
May 24, 2020

Hi there- ‘Guilt’ here
Its me -that unresolved sadness
That controlling daunting feeling
Those old mistake’s paralyzing dread

“I am so wrong”
 “I keep making mistakes”
“I am always a failure”
 “Oh the humiliation I bring”

Keep saying these things
Repeat them and I swell
It just makes me strong
You are under my spell

Unfair , exploiting
Emotionally manipulating you
I am hard at work
Falsifying your self view

Stomping on your solar plexus
Inner peace- I do reject
Weakening yourself to none
Expect more of poor neglect

As a parent , As a child
As a society - all I claim
I am the villain - I exist
Distorting expectations- constructing shame

- praj101

I just want...

She:
I just want him to listen
My problems at work and home
Just be there close to me
Appreciate  in words my work

Only if he says “ I love You
I know you are trying hard”
I don’t need any solution
Just a shoulder when I am sad

But he goes in other room
And stays quiet for so long
I just want him to talk
Hope he understands that

He:
I know she works so hard
I know it’s tough for her
But I can’t help her much
And I feel that’s not fair

I want to support her
But I don’t know what’s solution
And I worry what if I fail
To resolve her situation

If only she gives me space
A quiet place to think
I just want some time
Hope she understands this

Praj101

Card Games

Card games

So much fun
Name a few
Anyone

‘Mendhi coat’
‘Go fish’
‘Uno’ dos tres
‘Contract Bridge’

‘Bhikar-savkar’
‘Poker’ bet
‘Badam saat’
‘Challenge’ instead

’Rummy’ -‘sequence’
‘canasta ’- ‘judgement’
‘Gulam chor’
’Memory-game’

’Zabbu’ and
‘Solitaire‘
Some cheat while playing
While some are fair

’Saat- aath’
‘Pach - teen -don‘
‘Tinshe chaar’
Are card games done?

If not my friend
Then teach me few
Will love to learn
And play with you

Praj101

Why she is like that?

My older son always listens to us,  never fights and finishes his homework on time. I never had to scold him. So when he was young, one of my friends used to visit me with her two kids for playdates. I always though of them as well behaved, good kids. Still, I always thought my friend, their mom, is little more strict with them. She will take an extra step to make sure they behave and any misbehaviour would get a stern look and possibly a scold from her. When she would go home, I would always wonder why she is like that?  I would be totally judgemental about her parental style. Then after couple of years- my little one came along... I never judged anyone after that.
praj101

Which Nakshatra is you?

I like to learn astrology as a part of self study and nothing more. So yes, Nakshatra's - energy wheels of our horoscope- our Karmic storage. There are 27 Nakshatra, each with its unique characteristics. All the information gathered here is from different Vedic astrologers online /you tube-especially KRS astrology- my favorite. Tried to make it something fun and positive .

In your Birth chart- all planets will be in Nakshatras. Mainly information here is about moon as moon represents our mind .
Moon in each Nakshtra represents different characteristics/ personalities. Does your personality fits to your moon Nakshatra?

1. Ashwini: Planet: Ketu, Symbol: Horse head, Deity: Physician to Gods
Beginning- active, youthful, bold, Independent

2. Bharni: Planet: Venus, Symbol: Yoni , Deity: God of death
Giving, caring, Nourishing, also leisure seeking- balancing enjoyment and responsibility

3. Krittika: Planet: Sun; Symbol: Knife; Deity: God of fire
Powerful, fiery, dynamic, creative, truth seekers

4: Rohini: Planet: Moon, Symbol: Chariot, Deity: God Brahma
Creative, moving forward smoothly, bold, calm, happy-go-lucky

5: Mrigashirsha: Planet: Mars, Symbol: Deer Head, Deity: God Brahma
wandering, researching, peaceful, emotional, seeking truth

6: Ardra: Planet: Rahu, Symbol: Tear Drop, Deity: Rudra, Storm God
Creating revolution-big change, searching for gains

7.Punarvasu: Planet: Jupiter, Symbol: bow and arrow, Deity: Aditi, mother of all Gods
Intelligient and spiritual, good natured, Renewal, teachers, returning to good after struggles- like God Rama

8. Pushya: Planet: Saturn, Symbol: Cow's utter, Deity: Priest of God
Caring for others, serving to humanity, emotional

9:Ashlesha: Planet: Mercury, Symbol: Snake, Deity: Naga God

Maneuvering -moving forward; Caring, Nurturing, loving yet Logical, critical thinkers, direct speech

10: Magha: Planet: Ketu, Symbol: Royal Throne, Deity: The Godfather
Leaders, Regal, yet down-to-earth; crave spiritual knowledge. Do not care for wealth, status though they have it. 

11: Purva Phalguni: Planet: Venus, Symbol: Hammock, God: Prosperity
Artistic, creative, pleasure seeking, self-made, enjoy limelight, great in business

12:Uttara Phalguni: Planet: Sun, Symbol: Bed, God: God of Favors
Focus, disciplined, analytical, lucky in giving and getting favors, perfectionist

13: Hasta Nakshata: Planet: Moon, Symbol: Hand, God: Sun
hard workers, emotional, fighting for weak, calm , sensitive

14:Chitra: Planet- Mars, Symbol: Jewels, God:The celestial architect

Excellent will power and strength,ability to get things done, perfectionist,straight forward,, love gems and jewelry

15: Swati: Planet: Rahu, Symbol: single standing bush/wind, God: Wind God

Love Independence , like traveling, clever businessman, friendly

16: Vishakha: Planet: Jupiter, symbol:  Triuphal arch, God: God of fire

Mature, Intelligient, great teachers, good judge, creativity to make things easy for others 

17: Anuradha: Planet: Staurn, Symbol: Arch/ lotus flower, God: God of friendship

become stronger when mature, combination of energy and perseverance, intelligent, inclined towards occult knowledge.

18: Jyeshtha: Planet: Mercury, Symbol: Umbrella, God: Indra- Chief of God

Protective, Blessed with material richness, abundance, ambitious

19: Mula: Planet: Ketu, Symbol: Roots of trees, God:Goddess of destruction

digging deep to find root cause,philosophical, spiritual, great doctors and scientist

20:Purva Ashadha: Planet: Venus, Symbol: Elephant tusk, God: God of water

Love traveling, spiritual, philosophical, Intelligent, open minded, loving and creative

21: Uttara Ashadha: Planet: Sun, Symbol: Elephant tusk/ small bed: God: Universal God

Wise, action oriented, Intelligent, calm, love for learning, career oriented

22: Shravana : Planet: Moon, Symbol:Ear , God: Vishnu

Love to listen and learn, Amicable, peaceful, logical and practical , nourishing, preserve knowledge

23: Dhanishta: Planet: Mars, Symbol: Drums/Flute, God: God of earthly abundance

Happy-Go-Lucky, abundant will power, expressive, adaptable, socially interactive intellectually, friendly

24: Shatabhisha: Planet: Rahu , Symbol: Empty circle/ thousand doctors, God: Varuna

excellent problem solver, religious, intelligent, studious

25: Purva Bhadrapada: Planet: Jupiter, Symbol: Two faced man,  God: Fiery Dragon

Excellent teachers, wise, benevolent, friendly, social, good writers and researchers, good in occult and astrology

26: Uttara Bhadrapada: Planet: Saturn, Symbol: twins,  God: dragon of deep sea

Mystic,  spiritual, Diving deep into waters of wisdom, psychics, determination, wise

27: Revati: Planet: Mercury, Symbol: Pair of Fish/ a drum, Deity: Pushan/ God of nourishment

Mild, tender, peaceful, Givers to society, Intelligent, wise, healers, Social workers, Spiritual.

28: Abhijit: Hidden Nakshatra: Planet: Mercury , God:Brahma

Very Auspicious Nakshatra, Righteous, learned and famous, affectionate, soft spoken, kind,honest and optimistic

praj101

Courageous Breath

In life's tranqil ocean
Serene with inner bliss
Balance and steady
Mind is at utmost peace

With time-change comes
Just like wildest wave
In the storm like these
Calm is the new brave

Steading this unhinged boat 
Like a courageous sailor
Deep-slow -meditative
Our  "Breath" is our Anchor

praj101

Little fishy in the sea

Primer, foundation, mascara
Little blush on my cheeks
Bronzer , eye-liner
Rose pink on my lips

I get ready like a star
Bright, beautiful, shiny
Tip-toe in my pomp heels
Gorgeously smiling

Feel confident in my attire
And therefore confident in myself
My self respect depends on how
Others approve of my face

My dreams that I chase
My friends and family admire
I am happy for the day
That I am a “beautiful “ provider

At night I come home
Wash my face with fresh water
My shiny colors dissolve
And go in drainwater

A  baby fishy in the sea
Drenched in my colors-now die
My delicate self esteem
Has made his mommy cry

Praj101

Time in Physics vs. Experiential Time

In Physics time is linear .We as humans have divided time into e.g 24 hrs a day, different seasonal time which go in cycles etc. Well, for person like me such “scheduled time” has given a continuous rhythm in my day to day life and I appreciate that.

However, in this post, I am trying to explain time with a new dimension...time measured with our senses. I think we can call it “experiential time”- something that we derive from our senses and our own  experiences and interpretations of those experiences in our brain...cognitively.

What is this experiential time?
I may not have a solid definition per say. But let me elaborate. It is that dimension of time that comes in a way we experience world around us.

Here are some examples with some peculiar characteristics of this dimension .

1. This time can contract and expand -
 e.g. when we are reading a book, talking with our friends, gardening or doing any activity where we loose track of time- Sometimes we say - “time just flies” or “we have lost track of time”. In those situations time has contracted. Now if I am attending calculus lecture, trying my best to do meditation - or just sit and watch the clock for 1 minute- how do I experience time? For me it has expanded. I even remember watching clock and saying OMG 1 minute is so long. You can try it too. Again our experiences makes us feel time more in a wave form where it contracts and expand though without any cyclic or linear nature.

2. Time can go in “reverse” with experiences-
Sometimes we daydream about our childhood, about old friends etc . In this case time that we are spending goes back-back in time. Our sensory input has put time in reverse mode.

3. We can experience time in non-conforming  fashion .
Most of us experience time where we are kids and we are playing, studying etc. As we grow older we start job and family and later in life we enjoy retirement. However , some may experience life in a very different order. Someone from let’s say very poor family had to work as a kid but eventually maybe at  age 60 they went to college and got their degree . The way someone can experience time can be dramatically different.

4. This experiential time can be Transforming.
Imagine a girl very shy and quiet especially with introvert qualities who later became public speaker. Or someone started with a silver spoon as a child with love and support from family who ended up in problematic behavior as an adult.

5. Experiential time can be the best teacher.
We learn from our experiences and grow.. well most humans do. Experiencial time gives a lot of sensory input to work on evolving us with its positive feedback mechanism. Everyone grows - in spite of education that we had. Most job recruiters value experience of work. With same analogy- our temperament become mature as we grow. That’s why in our culture older adults are given respect as teachers of life as they have earned it with their lifelong handling of difficult situations.

I personally feel - measuring this time in life - thinking about how we have experienced life - is way more meaningful and informative than any clock with 12 numbers and two hands can be. This time differs from person to person and is very unique and therefore maybe cannot be explained in any physics textbook. Well if someone can calculate some kind of equation for such time- you would be genius and would do great service to humanity. Any physicist here? Or maybe it is not possible to explain such cognitive phenomena with any physics term.

However, ask importance to people who have difficulty experiencing this dimension of time. Someone with sensory processing disorders, Alzheimer’s or for that matter someone that binge watch TV  relentlessly while shuffling through different channels- all lack experiences that make life so lively and meaningful - of course in my opinion.

Experiencing life as it unfolds can have immense impact on our souls. Instead of doing things as per what others expect and wants from us won’t it be rewarding if we live life and design it depending on how we want to experience it.
One may say - in that case everyone just wants to be on “vacation” all the time. I don’t think that’s true. Will you go on vacation all the time? We all have inner intuition to know what we like and where we find our own joy. We just vibrate with better inner rhythm when we find it.

Now, a step future , think about our subconscious mind. In this phase - that we experience in our REM sleep- we may be traveling lifetimes with an immense speed. No clock can measure that.

Praj101