I recently started using sound healing and essential oils for massage to loose my weight. I am already following healthy eating and exercise habits. Yet sometimes I binge. Recently, after long stretch of truly good habit journey, I lost it on this weekend. I don’t remember what exactly happened but I binge ate both weekend nights.
By the end of two days, guilt had taken hold of me and I was planning and replanning how to get my lifestyle back on track. This has been a pattern in the past too. So yesterday when I went to sleep I had this nagging question on my mind. Why this thing happens with me?
Then somewhere in the middle of the night, I woke up suddenly. I must be dreaming . However, in my half sleep state I was clearly picturing a woman’s face. This woman looked malnourished (or bulemic with some eating disorder) to the point that I was able to see her bones. I didn’t recognize her as I don’t know anyone who looks like her. Her fair skin with hazel eyes image was quite vivid. I tried to bury this image under the “ weird dream “ category. Then I remembered my sound healing teacher’s words. She recently said that no emotion/ energy is good or bad. It’s just an energy. We assign names to things . Fear blocks energy. In that moment I shifted my focus and tried to bring her picture back in my mind. And then asked to no one in particular “who is this woman?” My sudden intuition said that that woman is me. Maybe in my past lives I was that woman. I thought that I must have gone through some tough period in life/ maybe malnourishment. And then things started rolling. Maybe that’s why I sometimes gets nuts when I am around food. Maybe my body is scared to loose weight due to this past life experience /memory. Maybe that’s the energy that I am always pushing against who blocks my weight loss. This can be just my minds game and maybe just a story that I spin in the middle of the night. But it felt real to me.. So at that moment I send compassionate thoughts to this woman. I told her to let go of the fear. I told myself to let go of the fear of getting malnourished if that fear exist in my subconscious. The connections that I built just by giving my intuition or imagination(?) a chance looks pretty convincing to me. I know after writing and reading this I myself felt this is so not science as I know. However, I think, I am at this stage in my life where I am ready to put faith in intuition that universe is guiding me towards. And that just feels right.
Praj101
