Spicy Paratha

How should I put this in a good way. Well, sorry - there is no good way. I am really angry. Angry over spicy parathas. Here is what happened. I bought parathas from an Indian lady and they were spicy. Way too spicy. Life's big problem. Someone is dying from a cancer, someone is going through difficult time with divorce, someone is facing global warming issues and someone like me is fudging angry about a spicy parathas. Ya- Ya -pathetic me. Me with my trivial life issues. And that's that. You really don't have to read any further. I mean literally- that's it. Well, if you are still reading then go ahead as apparently you may have had your own spicy paratha problems.  Beware, I am going to glorify myself as a total victim here-no apologies as I do feel like one right now.  Here is what happened. So- I woke up . Got kids up. Gave them breakfast.  Prepared  lunches and drop kids to school and went to work. I worked whole day- then picked up kids and came home. Gave kids snacks and drove them to their martial arts class. Then I did one thing that I was super excited about. After I dropped my kids to class , I went to get my parathas that I ordered from this nice Indian lady. Those parathas would have been our perfect dinner and our next days lunch. You may feel this as a small thing but for a busy mom like  me this is kind of a big deal that only happens occasionally. A gorgeous marvelous treat if I may say. With this resource I don't have to worry about cooking food for dinner or worry about what to give tomorrow for lunch-sweet. A well deserved act of kindness- that I was planning to show towards me. Recently, since I am taking interest in writing, I am thinking about more ways I can be resourceful and having someone providing me and my family with this Indian food does feels like a relief. So that's why...I felt angry when parathas were way too spicy. My kids won't even take a bite. It felt like a betrayal of my simple desire. Maybe this is my mid- life crisis. A spicy paratha.
However,  when I am thinking about this situation as a whole, I understood more intricate part of the problem. The problem is not just spicy parathas but a lack of specific communication skills from my side and therefore lack of desired outcome. This Indian lady that I bought parathas from is nice person trying to run small home business.  Her business model makes her flourish and at the same time helps people like me too. A good business indeed.  However,  in the past, she had made this 'making food too spicy' mistake few times already. In some of those times I ignored this fact and occasionally I have told her that her food is spicy and we prefer milder version in nicest possible way making sure I don't hurt her feelings. But unfortunately, she keeps forgetting this specific information again and again. And at the end, I have to suffer from spice induced acidity, wasting the value of money that I pay her for and wasting my efforts to drive to and from her place.  In reality me "being nice" hasn't  work for me.
What happens is that we come across people with different personalities. Some people are business oriented who take care of their customers while others are trying their best to carry a business without  even remembering their customers needs. Well, in this specific situation, this lady didn't pay attention for  my specific needs . When I pay for my services , I expect good outcome.  I definetely failed to communicate this with her. While I was busy being nice and building trust - the imp. part that I forgot is that this is -at the end- a business- a simple give and take.
Therefore this time, I called the lady and told her that I am going to freeze those parathas and return them to her next time as we won't be able to eat those. I told this lady exactly why I am not happy with her service at present. What are my expectations  in the future and how I need someone to respect those. She agreed to all of the above. I will take action as I mentioned earlier by returning her parathas to her so she knows that I mean business and any slack thereafter for any next orders will make her loose me as a customer. I am ready to give her one more chance just because she is good person and her location is definitely convenient for me. However, I also understand to be more resourceful and try to find more available services around in the area.
Some people are already good in dealing with others to get the outcomes that they desire. It is people like me, people pleasers, who have immense difficulty when it comes to conflicts and dealing with them. Finally, its a good realization that sometimes its just wise to treat a transaction as a transaction without involving too many emotions. Now, after analyzing this simple situation I understood importance of frank respectful yet direct communication instead of glossing a problem.
It’s atleast good to know that my midlife crisis is not about spicy paratha.
-praj101